how things are going

I know I haven’t posted a blog for a while. It has been a little crazy here. We have had quite a yo-yo ride here over the past two weeks.

The beginning of last week was very rough. Tim was dealing with coughing, choking, blocked airway severely for about 3 days. It was wearing him out. Eventually, he was so weak he wasn’t even taking in as much nutrients. As the coughing began to subside, he was able to regain some amount of calm toward the end of the week. He started to take in more food again.

Which promptly led to the beginning of this week when he started coughing and choking all over again. Tuesday morning was the worst this week – he was coughing for about 4 hours straight. As we started to look over the previous 10 days, we noticed the pattern that when he was taking in more fluid, he was coughing more. So we have made a very hard decision to limit the amount of fluid intake Tim gets. Which means that we are keeping his food intake to a minimum on a daily basis. On the positive side – the coughing has really been minimized by this decision. On the negative side – it has left Tim with a very dry mouth and usually somewhat to fairly hungry.

On another front, Tim’s use of morphine and methadone (both narcotics) has done quite a number on his digestive system. We have had to deal with constipation on a new level! We’ve taken measures to fix this issue, but there are still consequences of it that are making Tim quite uncomfortable.

About three days ago, things have taken a different air here. Tim is much more unhappy. He is rating his general well-being as a 6 out of 10 (10 being worst). Previously, he had been marking that as a 2. He has had friends from work come over several times and has been quite reflective after they leave. In fact, on Wednesday he was quite weepy for the rest of the day after they left. Thursday and Friday were spent quite somber as well.

Thursday evening, the boys were able to go spend the night at a friend’s house. They played all day long with them on Friday, including Sky Zone. They ended up staying there last night as well. It was a good break for them. They needed a couple days away. Hopefully, they will have gotten a little margin back in their lives again.

Today, Tim is sleepy again. He was uncharacteristically alert yesterday. The toxicity in his blood is catching up to him now though. As I watch him, I see his breathing is slowing down.

I think we are all ready to let Tim be with Jesus now. It is so hard to see him in this condition. He is uncomfortable, he is unable to do anything, he cannot even tell us how he feels for the most part. Please pray that he can be as comfortable as possible and pray that his move to his eternal home will come peacefully and soon.


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